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Disconnect to Connect: 10 Days OFF from Facebook

Today’s highly advanced technology brings amazing things I have never imagined I could experience a few years back. Of all the bliss this digital age has offered, there’s one particular thing I can’t deny as the best – the ability to stay CONNECTED.

In these modern times where social networking is considered part and parcel of people’s lives, it’s almost impossible to know someone (at least in my circle) who doesn’t have any online account or has never tried using any type of social media – may it be Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or others.

Because of social media’s ease of use and access, most people are almost always online, updated, and connected. With a single click or tap, connections are easily made online. Connections, particularly on Facebook, are made in ways like liking, commenting, sharing, or even merely reading someone’s status updates. The very act of getting in touch with others is already a connection.

Connection is NOT always Communication

But the question is, are we really connected? I mean, how deep and genuine are these connections? And does connection mean communication? I don’t think so. Not always the case.

For the past previous weeks, I feel like I’ve been staying connected online ALL the time. Connected in ways like I liked many, commented to some, shared a few, and read a lot, while I posted my own updates too.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t see any problem being connected with people online. It’s great! But my concern is about connecting with the real people, in the real world. You know, engaging with the actual people around me – and not the virtual folks I’ve been connecting to remotely online.

You see, whenever I start to check my Facebook, I feel like there’s a *strong* magnetic force attracting me to scroll endlessly on the tons of status updates. While I immerse into the piles of pictures & videos and facts & drama, I find myself too attached to this online world and clearly detached to my real world. I realized that while I plug myself online, I isolate myself from my actual surrounding.

In short, connecting online means disconnecting in reality.

It’s sad but it’s happening. To address my guilt, I deactivated my Facebook account for more than a week and I disconnected online to connect back meaningfully to my reality.

Disconnect to Connect

From the short 10 days off from Facebook alone, I realized how disconnected I’ve become from the real things that matter. Here’s a short list of the things I missed.

I missed connecting with real people face to face.

I realized that I missed having a lengthy and meaningful talk with the real people around me. While I can quickly throw in a few comments on Facebook, having a real conversation (not small talks) is rare in reality.

I can’t even remember the last time I hung out with my old friends from Highschool. Or talked to someone about significant life decisions.

I missed connecting with my kids.

This is so important. I missed connecting with my kids in a way that I am not just being there for them but truly being with them. Many times I feel like I am just “there” physically but mentally & emotionally disconnected.

When I get so hooked online, I find myself quickly irritated by my kids’ interruptions and being impolite in getting my attention while I’m on my phone. After disconnecting online, I realized that it was actually me who was rude enough to keep checking my phone while being with them.

I missed connecting to the real things that matter

Obviously, while I connect online, I spend waste a good amount of time doing nothing but tapping and scrolling through the many seemingly “cool” stuff. Thus I lose precious time that should have been spent in doing important things.

I missed writing in my journal, reflecting, reading, (and even cleaning!) or just going out for a short walk. I realized that there’s a lot more “better” things to do other than scrolling and tapping. The list goes on and on.

I missed connecting with myself

Lastly, the most important connection that I have to restore is connecting to myself. Instead of trying to know others online, I better get to know myself even more first. I missed spending some “alone” time just being silent, to really listen to myself.

Once in a while, I think we all need to spend enough time to be on our own. A time to understand ourselves, know our wants and discover our passions. A time to reflect back on our goals, write our dreams, and design our lives.

After disconnecting, I realized that every time I am connected back to myself, AMAZING THINGS JUST HAPPEN!

Last Words

Though social networking evidently brings closeness to people and clearly makes connections easier, I just hope we don’t solely rely on this as our means of communication. I believe that a simple connection DOESN’T always mean a communication. We may be connected, but no communication may have transpired in each connection.

More importantly, we need to remind ourselves that as we welcome each connection online, we may be shutting off the doors to the real connections offline.

Now over to you… Re-examine the online connections you’ve made and try to check how deep and genuine they are.

Tell me, are you really connected to “reality”?

You might be staying connected online quite too often now that you’re missing out your real connections, in the real world. Maybe, just maybe… it is time for you to snap back to reality and DISCONNECT to connect.

“Life is good, my friends. Make the most out of it by keeping your connections real. :)”

Cheers,


*this post was originally published on my old site (Mommy Rose Blog) last 2015.

 

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31 Comments

  • Reply Jhanis

    Disconnecting from social media can be a challenge especially to us bloggers but I do it once in a while. It's important that we experience life not through the screens of our phones and computers but experience it as it happens.
    Great post!

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Adrenaline Romance

    Nice! When we travel or go on adventures, we rarely bring tablets. For the duration of our adventures, we basically have a no-electronics rule except our cameras (to take photos) and phones (for emergencies).

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    Right, connection is not always equal to communication… And yes, let's aim for the old fashion way which is way better in keeping real connections. Thank you! 🙂

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply channel imperial

    You got me at "Connection is not communication." It may or may not be true all the time, but I hope we all aim to communicate the old fashion way; talking with our mouths and listening to what people have to say. ^_^

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    Agree! As Mary Kay Ash said it, "If you think you can, you can. If you think you can't, you're right." 😉

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    Like many of us, the real challenge is to disconnect from distractions para focus sa online work. Hehe Thanks!

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Que Sullano - Gavan

    challenging indeed but just like any other things, once you are determined, nothing is impossible.

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Maan

    Really nice experiment! I wish I can also do this, but for now, it's quite unlikely because a lot of my work involves using the Internet.

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    I feel you. I guess many of us now need some "timeout". Hehe Thank you for sharing.. 🙂

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    Same here. My almost two-year old son would either grab my phone or repeatedly say "Butang na mommy!!“ (“Put it down mommy!!“) Ops! Hehe

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply milastolemyheart

    I started to limit my online hours when my daughter learned how to grab the phone/tab off my hands to force me to look at her. As much as possible, no phone for me when I'm with her.

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Cheanne

    I am super guilty of being with the kids but always checking something on my phone. It's like I'm not with them at all. I should learn to disconnect some also. 🙂

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    Good to know I'm not alone. Haha And yes, I had the same experience with my sleep, from that short 10 days I practiced sleeping earlier as I wasn't stuck at tapping anything. Haha Now that I'm back on FB, I try my best not to check my phone at night so when I get home from work, I spend all the time with my kids in bed leaving my phone just in my bag. One thing though is my kids' constant "YouTube" request as it has became a bedtime routine but I always insist on doing something else like having a longer story time and I think it's working! Hehe
    Thank you for sharing your experience! 🙂

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Kit Kat

    Nice thoughts! 🙂

    I did this before, but that was the time when I was so depressed and started to deactivate my account from FB. I stay disconnected for more than 2 weeks and I felt actually really great. MInd you, I even had a good and uninterrupted sleep when I deactivated my account. 🙂
    Now obviously I'm back on FB, but I learned to limit myself from using it. Sometimes, I'm guilty of overusing it. You're right, there's like a force that keeps you from scrolling down updates and checking if you have new notifications. hehe!

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    Oh right, the FB page. When I deactivated my account, I completely forgot about my (our) business page as well, good thing my brother was one of the active admins also. hehe

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply onebigbreakfast

    I haven't really tried deactivating Facebook yet but I've been contemplating on doing it maybe for 5 days. Only problem is the facebook page I manage – I might ask someone else to take my place during the 5 days. hehe

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    Haha same with us! Both my kids are quite attached to Youtube to the point that I have to download a few of their fave videos on my phone nalang. hahaha

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Mecheel Casenas

    I think It's a challenge being offline for awhile. But I guess, I will fail, lol. Even my kid hated it when there's no internet connection, she keeps asking where's youtube? Mama, please fix the internet. hahaha

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    You don't really have to as long as your online life isn't interfering sa reality. 🙂 I'm not actually posting this as a challenge but more of as a reflection, it just so happens na umabot talaga ng 10 days akong nag.offline. Hehe Thanks for dropping by!

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    Go try it! Let me know how far you could go offline from FB.

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Aci Girl

    10days? parang di ko kaya 🙂 internet connection is para nang life line for me lol but I make it a point na madetach din once in a while or else baka di na ako makarelate sa reality

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply sarah tirona

    i should do this too….

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    You can Emjae! Haha I was completely off without Facebook BUT was on Instagram for some days though. Hahaha Instagram is always an inspiration for me while FB is too much sometimes.

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    Oh the "perfect" lives on FB! I can relate! Haha Yes, it's definitely a matter of priorities. While most people connect online for good, I noticed many are also disconnected from the real world. I actually wrote this with the mind and feelings of an "ordinary" user, so I initially intend to target the ordinary people who may need to disconnect once in a while. Thanks for sharing your insights! 🙂

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    It's really challenging, but it can be done. I feel that it's actually a good exercise to unplug online as long you don't risk any important commitment going on like online job or the like. 😉

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rose Angelie

    I agree, it's difficult especially for social media advocates. I can't even believe I survived 10 days missing some great stuff from the online community. But of course, I was happily connected to reality. Thank you Jhanis.

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Oh Emjae

    Yeah I must admit it really wastes much of my time. It believe we need this reality check once in a while but can we haggle for one day only? Hahaha

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Rea Alducente

    I see you have great points. I think it's also a matter of knowing and understanding one's priorities and being aware of one's lifestyle. Some people tend to feel sorry about their lives because their friends are posting their "perfect" lives on FB. Lol. As for me, I use FB a lot to communicate with family and friends because I'm far from them plus it's free. Hehe 🙂

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply kiat cebu

    Maybe, I should try out keeping myself away from the internet too, but I doubt if I can fight it. This is quite a challenge.

    June 26, 2015 at 7:40 am
  • Reply Ronalene Soluta

    Connection doesn’t always means communication. That’s a very powerful statement you have right there.
    With the same thought, I did my own thing last month. Being so tired of toxicity Facebook is bringing me everyday, I trimmed down my friend list from 4,000 friends down to 2,000. It helps a little 🙂

    August 15, 2017 at 12:15 am
    • Reply Rose Angelie

      True. And wow, 4K friends? Sometimes, I even feel overwhelmed with all the updates when I just barely have 700 people on my list. lol Thanks for dropping by, Ronalene 🙂

      August 15, 2017 at 4:09 pm

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